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a word on a whim

anything but predictable #momlife

June 15, 2018June 17, 2018

Pregnancy Products

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June 15, 2018June 15, 2018

Expecting Evi

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June 14, 2018July 23, 2019

Divorced at 24

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June 14, 2018July 23, 2019

Out of Coffee

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October 19, 2016July 23, 2019

Not Just a Month

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October 28, 2015July 23, 2019

Reminiscent Words

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September 19, 2015July 23, 2019

Growing Up

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June 26, 2015July 23, 2019

A Gracious Heart

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June 19, 2015July 23, 2019

No Longer Just Surviving

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“wave to auntie” 🥰 . . . . . #babygirl #babiesofinstagram #myformerbump #julybaby #1yearold #mommysgirl #momlife #motherhood #diariesofanewmom #awordonawhim #stayathomemom #workfromhomemom #pnwbaby #northwestbabe #browneyedbabe
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sometimes, when you’re having your third miscarriage in 5 months, you end up in the hospital for “excessive bleeding.” and sometimes, rather than comfort or words of hope, you simply want to say: this f***ing sucks. . . . . . #babygirl #babiesofinstagram #myformerbump #momlife #motherhood #diariesofanewmom #awordonawhim #stayathomemom #workfromhomemom #pregnancyloss #miscarriageawareness #missedmiscarriage
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when you go to the fancy doctor, they put stars on the ceiling of the ultrasound room. maybe they know their patients need something to look at aside from the screen. because that screen doesn’t always show wiggly babies and healthy heartbeats. sometimes it shows an empty uterus. or a baby that isn’t growing right. or nothing at all. + 4 months ago, a similar screen showed us my empty womb. 2 weeks ago, this very screen showed us a beautiful yolk sac looking exactly as it should. today, however, the heartbeat we were told would be “easy to find” was absent. the baby that had been growing perfectly 2 weeks ago was barely visible. after a 30 minute vaginal ultrasound (yes, 30 minutes... would not recommend a wand down there that long), there was no point to continue looking for things that just weren’t there. + we did some bloodwork today, will do some more in a few days, and have another ultrasound next week. but it doesn’t look good. the doctor told us to be realistic, and balanced with our hope. maybe this baby is okay. but it probably (doctor said 95% certainty) isn’t. + we had been looking forward to this ultrasound. with our “perfect baby” 2 weeks ago, we were pulled into a sort of false hope. today, we left the hospital numb. evelyn came with us to this appointment, to see “baby.” she’s been talking about the baby, she’s been snuggling my tummy. + + + + + #pregnancyloss #pregnancyafterloss #1in4 #miscarriage
it’s a family business ☕️ . . . . . #babygirl #babiesofinstagram #myformerbump #julybaby #1yearold #mommysgirl #momlife #motherhood #diariesofanewmom #awordonawhim #stayathomemom #workfromhomemom #pnwbaby #northwestbabe #browneyedbabe

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